LMU’s baseball season may be more than halfway over, but we’re only a few days away from the beginning of the MLB season. It’s a great time to get into — or get back into — baseball. The sport has a long history and a rich culture, as well as a language that’s all its own.
The rules and terminology can be intimidating, but that’s where I come in. Consider me your coach. Here are a few colorful terms that will make you sound and feel like a real bleacher creature.
Cheddar — Cheddar, or cheese, refers to a great pitch, particularly a fastball. Saying someone is “pumping cheddar” has nothing to do with dairy, but means that they are consistently throwing good stuff.
LOOGY — I know, this sounds … phlegmy. However, the real definition is much less gross. LOOGY is actually an acronym for Left-handed One Out Guy, or a lefty specialist relief pitcher who might be brought in to pitch certain matchups and then be removed from the game.
Frozen Rope — As if baseball terms weren’t confusing enough, frozen rope has two commonly accepted explanations that almost directly contradict each other. One says that it’s a hard line drive with no arc; the other says that it’s an accurate, powerful defensive throw. Either way, the ball travels in a straight line, like—you guessed it—a rope that’s been frozen. See? You’re catching on already.
Golden Sombrero — Here’s an award no one wants to win. Unlike in hockey, a hat trick in baseball is three strikeouts in the same game. A step above a hat trick, the golden sombrero is a rare four strikeouts in a single game.
Can of Corn — An easy outfield catch. The ball falls into the glove like a can of corn falling off a grocery store shelf, which is how it got its name. Don’t ask me why the corn is canned, or why it’s placed so high that you need to knock it off the shelf or why corn is the first thing that comes to mind when catching a baseball. I didn’t name these things, and to be honest, corn isn’t that good.
Meatball — If cheddar is a hard pitch to hit, a meatball is its opposite. A meatball is a pitch that seems to come slowly right down the middle of the plate (pun not intended), giving a batter plenty of time to hit it.
Ducks on the Pond — Let’s take a break from thinking about baseball. Imagine something tranquil, like ducks floating quietly on a pond. Maybe they’re spread out. Maybe they’re waiting for the opportunity to take off. You got an image? Okay, great, because I lied. We’ve been thinking about baseball all along. Transfer your image of the ducks into an image of runners standing on base. It’s exactly the same, but different.
Eephus — A strange name for a strange pitch, and that’s by design. Eephus pitches are thrown extremely slowly in order to throw a batter off, and may also incorporate another novelty, like this pitch from Japanese pitcher Kazuhito Tadano. I’m not sure what’s more difficult — throwing the ball like that or actually hitting it.
Dinger — Just one of approximately 7,000 terms for a home run. Like homer. Or tater. Or big fly. Long ball. Blast. Bomb. Jack. Going yard. Leaving the station. I made that last one up, but it sounds legit, right?
Oppo Taco — We’ll call this Dinger 1a. An oppo taco is a home run that is hit to the opposite side of the field from where the batter is standing. For a right-handed hitter, an oppo taco home run would land over the right field fence, as opposed to pulling the ball nearly behind them to left field.
Grand Salami — Here’s Dinger 1b. A play on grand slam, a grand salami is a home run that occurs when the bases are loaded, resulting in four runs scored. For those of you keeping score at home, we're now at five baseball words named after food.
Hot Corner — Third base. Of the two corner infield positions, third basem*n have more responsibility defensively as they must complete farther throws across the diamond to first base, and because the ball is more frequently hit down the third base line. Third base is called the hot corner because the people who play there are busier, not because they’re more attractive than players at any other position. You can sort that one out amongst yourselves.
Rake — While there is a lot of grass on the field, there’s usually a grounds crew to take care of that. This type of raking refers to work done with a different tool—a bat. Someone who can rake is a powerful hitter, and likely hits frequent home runs. With the advent of the universal designated hitter in MLB, we’ve likely seen the end of an era of #pitcherswhorake. Gone, but forever in our hearts.
Battery — A battery is the combination of the pitcher and catcher, who often become close on and off the field. A strong battery can make sparks fly, while a disconnect between the positions can spell disaster.
Web Gem — Referring to the web of the glove, a web gem is an exceptional defensive play. These are the kind of plays that put you on SportsCenter, though let’s be real, we all tuned in for the “This is SportsCenter” commercials instead.
Airmail — The delivery gets to its destination fast enough, just maybe not to the right location. Airmailing is when a ball is thrown far out of the reach of a fielder, most frequently over the head of the first baseman.
Cannon — The ability to make very far throws both accurately and hard. Important to note that having a cannon typically refers to defensive positions, like catchers and outfielders, not pitchers.
Bush League — Something below what’s considered to be acceptable standards. Can be used to describe behavior, playing technique, equipment/facilities or anything else that simply doesn’t cut it.
Chin Music — A high and inside pitch that comes near a batter’s head. Chin music is typically an accident, but can be used by a pitcher to “brush back” a batter who’s crowding the plate. It seems scary and definitely not melodic, but hey, maybe that’s just me.
Lettuce — Also known as flow, lettuce is a term bestowed to only the most glorious of baseball hair. Hair that qualifies as lettuce is typically well-kept and flows past the bottom of a baseball cap, often to or past the shoulders.
Filthy — Being filthy doesn’t mean that you don’t take care of your flow. Filthy or nasty are both primarily used to describe a pitch with movement and control. A fastball might be hard to hit, but it typically doesn’t “break” or move down or across as much as other types of pitches like a curveball or slider do.
Pickle — The thing about all these terms is that if you really squint, you can almost make sense of how they got their names. For example, a pickle is when a runner gets caught between two bases, causing the defensive players to chase them down. Pickle … between two bases … like a sandwich … I get it. I’m trying really hard to get it.
